Kids Know How to Have Good, Clean, Invisible Fun

Child behavior experts say fantasy friends are emotionally healthy for kids and a sign of an active imagination.

Pretend play of all sorts emerges at about 2 1/2 and continues into the elementary school years, says Jan Faull, an author and child development expert who writes a parenting column for the online magazine Family Planet (https://family.starwave.com).

“It’s just a really healthy way of sorting out fantasy and reality,” whether the pretending involves invisible friends or actual objects and toys, says Faull, the mother of three.

Children may use imaginary friends to do things that they can’t or to work out emotional dilemmas, she says. “If your child is not feeling very brave, the imaginary friend may be very brave.”

Faull suggests that parents play along with the fantasy, perhaps setting a place at the table for the phantom guest if your child invites the friend to dinner. But deliver a reality check, she says, if the imaginary friend starts getting the blame for broken knickknacks or mysterious crayon marks on the wall.

Most children acknowledge that their invisible pals are actually a pretending game by the time they reach age 5, Faull says.