White Sox Supplied Arms to the Enemy

I don’t know what the Dodgers ever did to the White Sox--other than defeat them in the 1959 World Series--to make those Chicago finks collaborate with L.A.’s enemy this way.

But three things, I do know:

1. Da Sox haven’t been in a World Series since 1959.

2. They ain’t goin’ this year, either, my friends.

3. And, for some reason, the White Sox are doing everything they can to keep the Dodgers from going.

Boy, I bet Mr. Murdoch must be doing a burn.

I mean Mr. O’Malley. Sorry.

As for myself, I am so upset with the White Sox, I now believe they lost the 1959 World Series on purpose, as well as 1919’s.

Well, as I always say:

Any team with Albert Belle can’t be all good.

Why, oh why, did the White Sox trade three of their top pitchers Thursday to the pitching-impaired San Francisco Giants?

Something we did? Something we said?

There we were, minding our own business here in Southern California, enjoying a couple of baseball’s hottest teams.

The Dodgers were gaining ground on San Francisco so quickly, four TV channels had to send traffic copters to follow the high-speed pursuit.

I guess they were really feeling the pressure up there in Candlestick 3-Com 3-M 3-D 3-Stooge Park, or whatever it’s called.

“We’re living for the present,” bragged Brian Sabean, the Giant general manager, of his blockbuster deal with the Sox.

As the trade deadline came and went, the Dodgers didn’t need to do much. Their sixth-best starting pitcher was better than San Francisco’s best.

That is why the Giants were in such need of pitchers. I’ve seen better arms on chairs.

Luckily for them, Jerry Reinsdorf was just opening a brand new Pitchers R Us branch in Chicago.

This is the man who has to pay Michael Jordan, Scottie Pippen, Frank Thomas and Ding Dong Belle more money than a mint can print. Reinsdorf owns both the Bulls and the White Sox, which is kind of like owning an original Picasso and a black-velvet picture of dogs playing poker.

Upon hearing the way Reinsdorf gave away the store, Brett Butler of the Dodgers said, “When the owner [does] something like that, I guess all the fans are giving up too. There’s something wrong there.”

Reinsdorf’s (few remaining) players were furious Thursday as they arrived in Anaheim to begin a four-game series against a team that does care about this season.

Because while the Angels were trying to improve their club (by acquiring Ken Hill), and while the Seattle Mariners were doing likewise (by landing Mike Timlin) and while the St. Louis Cardinals were being bold (by getting Mark McGwire), the White Sox were cutting more bodies than the doctors at Chicago Hope.

Harold Baines, Wilson Alvarez, Roberto Hernandez, Danny Darwin . . . add them to Tony Phillips, and you have dumped a pretty good team.

Ozzie Guillen explained that the previous day’s trade of Baines had not been why he broke a clubhouse television. I think by Thursday night, however, Ozzie must have been curious how many TVs he could throw into the Pacific Ocean.

Robin Ventura wondered aloud why he came back from a serious injury in time for “Aug. 1, the end of the season.” Dave Martinez said all he knew was, the Giants got three pitchers who will help them.

And hurt the Dodgers?

Well, the blue boys took the news in stride.

“Oh, geez . . . they got Darwin,” Butler said, feigning fear.

OK, Brett, so Darwin is one of the few men in uniform older than you.

Seriously, I think the Dodgers had better bear down, because this trade could blow up their whole season. The Giants just pulled off the summer’s biggest robbery. If the Dodgers don’t make the playoffs, it could be that the last week of July was the week the Dodgers got--if Peter O’Malley will excuse the expression--outfoxed.

My big regret is that the Dodgers didn’t ask the White Sox for some infield help.

“Which infielders?” the Sox would have asked.

“All of them,” the Dodgers could have said.

That way, four more lucky White Sox could have stayed here in California.